My desire can not outweigh my reality, however much I might wish it to. That's not a failing on my part. A sadness? Yes, but a failing? No. And the same is true for you, too. Whatever qualities or traits you wish you possessed but don't are not likely things you can adopt, take on or develop in any permanent way because that is not who you were born to be. That's not what your birthright spark is destined to illuminate.