Dr Marry and I did what so many of us do: we make a big declaration about something...anything in our lives. And we make a great big splash about it.
Dr. Marry and Me
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So much already planned for 2023
Happy new year! I hope your 2023 is off and running. I’m using this post as an opportunity to share three offers I have created for the new year. Some of this can get confusing if you don’t live in my brain (be so happy about that, btw!), so I’ll try to explain as carefully as I can what each offer entails. I hope you’ll be as excited by one or more of them as I am. A FREE, virtual, 3-day (re)Discover Your Spark experience Tuesday, January 17—Thursday, January 19 over zoom from 11:45-12:45 CDT. In September, I held my first-ever, free opportunity for people to get a taste of…
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Facebook memories inspired my word for 2023!
It's amazing to realize that on this day, five years ago, I would have hesitated to say why the year had been difficult and heartbreaking. I would have stumbled over the truth behind what made it joyful, surprising and blessed because I wasn't yet, we weren't yet, ready to openly share our story. Perhaps we didn't yet trust that this new phase would last, given how relatively effortlessly the shift from utter despair to absolute joy had arrived at our doorstep. I also know that shame was still part of our lives. It might have downgraded to a baby elephant, but given that they weigh 200+ pounds at birth, that's…
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Who are the banks of your river?
I'm in the midst of making big, life-altering decisions, and Dr Marry's opinion is the most important one to me now. Today, he listens, asks thoughtful questions and considers all the options before sharing his ideas. The banks he provides keep my water contained but moving forward in a dynamic, fluid, evolving direction. We are alongside each other, the water up against the bank, creating an equal push and pull. And we effortlessly transition back and forth between the two different roles depending on the needs of the other.
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Flip the narrative to find your spark
More than three years ago, I conceived of a pretty audacious vacation with friends and family to celebrate a big milestone in my life. Dr Marry and I are providing a fabulous opportunity for people to travel and stay in a big, beautiful house that we're renting as our gift to them. But they still have to get themselves there, pay for food and other accommodations beyond the house since it's just for three nights. While some people have decided, for various reasons, that they can't make the trip work, a number of people have enthusiastically said, "We're in!" Just because I plan something doesn't mean it will work for…
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Why walking not talking really matters
It can be overwhelming to realize that talking rarely changes things. And it adds to the shame you already feel for uttering something out loud that doesn't get better. That kind of "failure" can lead to making worse and more poor decisions.
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Is dreaming asking too much?
The same way I can't comprehend that the Universe is literally expanding and contracting simultaneously, I can't exactly understand this cosmic paradigm either, but I don't need to understand it to believe it. There's no end, no finite amount of more, particularly when it's asked for and accepted in the right spirit: one of gratitude, grace and generosity.
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Looks can be deceiving
This photo popped up in my memories today. I’m sharing it because behind this absolutely stunning dress (my grandma’s that she wore to the 1961 or 63 ND Governor’s Ball) and big smile is a woman who is as sick as she has ever been (including when I had COVID in Dec 2020). She is hopped up on DayQuil to the point of near hallucination. Her chest and back are covered in stress hives. She has a bruise on her chin from where she passed out the morning before getting out of the shower. Her husband is on day 8 of in-patient rehab for alcoholism and has been away from…
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It’s my five year -versary, too
If he had died, so many of my "problems" would have been solved. I would have gotten his life insurance policy, which would have taken care of the financial insecurity we constantly faced. I would have been cast as the poor, young widow whose husband had gone too soon. People who'd lived with alcoholism somewhere in their lives would have passed knowing glances at whatever reason given for his death because I certainly didn't know that that was what we were dealing with. He'd always been kind of "sickly," so I guess the rest of us would have chalked it up to a poor constitution, as if we didn't have…
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What’s your true calling?
My desire can not outweigh my reality, however much I might wish it to. That's not a failing on my part. A sadness? Yes, but a failing? No. And the same is true for you, too. Whatever qualities or traits you wish you possessed but don't are not likely things you can adopt, take on or develop in any permanent way because that is not who you were born to be. That's not what your birthright spark is destined to illuminate.
