One year ago today, the Universe granted me a second, crystal clear message: I am a Personal Systems Disruptor. This time, it came to me without any of the fear, anxiety or awe that the first channeled conversation with the divine had.
Early in the morning of January 13, 1996, a transluscent angel sat at the foot of my bed, and in the calmest, gentlest of ways, told me that the unexpected water running between my legs 4 1/2 weeks before my due date was the answer I had desperately sought about what to do with my unplanned pregnancy. In that moment, my rapidly beating heart returned to a normal beat, my breathing calmed and I felt a kind of peace I had not known for months. I’ve always assumed that much of Quinn’s personality and success is because he was marked by a higher power for something profound.
But what did that mean for me? Where do I fit into that cosmic plan?
September 5, 2020, a voice of utmost authority spoke and settled this new title upon me with a complete understanding that this role, Personal Systems Disruptor, was actually what I had been born to do with my time remaining on this earth.
How often do we beg, plead, ask the Universe, God, our ancestors, the spirits to provide answers to our greatest needs or desires?
There’s a little parable about a man who dies and gets to Heaven. There, God says, “Let me take you around.”
They first go past a room of angels, busily picking up sheets of paper and cataloging them in various ways. God says, “This is the room where requests are processed.”
Next door, another group of angels are scurrying to and fro. God says, “This is where we answer the requests.”
Finally, they go to the next building, and one angel is sitting, tapping a pen on the table.” God says, “This is where we process the thank you notes.”
You don’t have to read very far into my blog to know that I have abandoned organized religion, but that doesn’t at all speak to or negate the faith I have in a much larger, amorphous force. I don’t much care what it looks like or is: for me, a definition is not necessary. My mind still often envisions an ancient man with a long flowing beard, but that’s absolutely a product of having grown up in a highly paternalistic religious community versus what I think this great energy source actually is. And if my mind settles on a loving grandad type, I let it be because when it envisions an endless sunset of colors or a room full of angels or a vast sea of molecules bouncing around, I let that be, too.
The point of this post is simply to give the angel in the third office something pleasant to take up some of its workday. I have privately thanked the Universe and God and my guardian angels and my ancestors and the energy flow of all that has been and will ever be for this gift, but today, one year later, it feels right to again express my gratitude.
I knew in that moment last year I was having a transformational moment. And today, even though I didn’t receive any direct heavenly message, I’ve had the same feeling. I’m on the cusp of another evolution, and I want to say thank you for what I have learned this year and for what is coming.